constitution.

had pure ice vanilla (coffee bean, i have never been a fan of coffee bean. my loyalty remains to starbucks but today was circumstantial. i heart starbucks!) over a very sensitive and touchè subject - infidelity.

kidding me right, who am i to talk about infidelity? i know i looked like the kind who would act on infidelity but the fact is, the only time i ever did, was the last time i ever did and had never felt like an asshole than ever because i hurt the one i loved most of these 21 years. maybe i had my reasons, maybe it was circumstantial, maybe it was the other party maybe maybe, so many reasons but could never cover up for the fact that i committed infidelity.

but she wasn't the only victim, so was i. everyone around us, without a doubt, took part in committing an infidelity either being the wrecker or the slut.

my eyes were on fire, my words were so bitter, my face flushed with anger, my body raged when i thought of my past paranoias, suspicious, the bitterness, the overwhelming truth that hit you hard, the denials and so much more.

what constitutes a good relationship? (and when i mean relationship, means ready to commit and not those flings or whatever no-status quo kind)

#1, trust
#2, accountability
#3, compromising
#4, two-way communication
#5, long term goals for the r/s

of course, this is what i have been trying to inculcate into my relationships. i know it sound kind of serious, but if you are not serious, why are you in a relationship? relationship does mean you are ready to take the matters into another level, and it should be an adult relationship and not some silly puppy relationship (eUUu b mUa sTeADy okIe?)

all must co-exist, or at least first 3 must be established to maintain a good relationship, i ain't no expert at relationships but evaluating from my countless relationship(s), i have come to conclusion of the kind of relationship i really want THAT IS if i ever get into another one. in addition, it takes two to make a relationship work because if i can establish all of them, it is futile if my partner do not partake or share the same kind of values, or rather similar values.

#2, accountability do not mean "reporting" i.e. "dear i am going to bathe/shit/eat/cook" NO NO NO. don't make it sound like a hassle to have the courtesy to let your partner know where would you be going and with whom, and don't make it sound like you need privacy and you don't need to "report". can't you see it isn't "reporting"? it is allowing your partner to have some space to be somewhere without her and my friend is right about this sentence, "if you have nothing to hide, then there isn't anything that's not answerable."

this is accountability, amateur relationships wouldn't have it. but do not take advantage of this accountability because if you overdo it, it will become an irritability.

what constitutes of infidelity? ( i am rather anal about the list)

#1, physical intimacy with someone else (i.e. making out, lusty kissing, sex)
#2, emotional infidelity (i.e. falling in love with someone else/having a crush?!)
#3, unnecessary endearments in texts (i.e. "hi honey bunny")
#4, excessive texting with an unknown someone
#5, clearance of inbox and sentbox
#6, excessive flirting context with an unknown someone
#7, anything that you are hiding.

(more to come)

they do not have to co-exist, and you will get hell from me because i am very particular and very sensitive to suspicious acts. my instincts are as strong as animal instinct but for mine, it is called women's instincts, and they are usually rather accurate especially concerning infidelity. honestly, if you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to lie about, there wouldn't be any vibes and traces of anxiety. really, the more you have to hide, the more dodgy you seemed.

it is like if you did fake an orgasm, i would know.

so what are your constitutions?