wake me up

i stole a picture of you i hope you dont mind because that's all i have of you, a still you. it was a great picture because you were smiling, as if to me and its still. i hesitated if i should put you up on my ceiling and every morning you would be there smiling at me after being drowsy night after night, then i realized you might want the space of your own and i would still remain you in my juice magazine i dont want to distort any single part of you. there's very little truth in between the words we've spoken. your eyes, i loved looking into them they are like a vortex that sucks me into your soul and we speak. now, i found myself staring into the dark abyss that i know i am losing my way and there isnt anyway to reach out, its too cold. you couldnt even reach my eyes to greet me before you turned and walked away, you couldnt even hear me saying that i was the proudest person in the room before you turned and walked away and, you couldnt even take my hands to send you away with my best wishes.

maybe your eyes were full of pain but i wouldnt know if you couldnt even look at me. i thank you for your cold, heartless action because in that way i know, you still cared and maybe loved me a little. until you could look at me and speak to me like two normal people do, you are always going to be this cold and heartless.

i found myself caressing your cheeks and running my fingers across your lips, i know i could never have you ever again. and this picture, is all i am left with. i think i am so naive to think that you might just find your way to me again, but these 2months i know you are never going to try anymore because right now, you are losing me only and nothing more.

and i am just a nobody, that you could replace me with your ADD so easily that maybe i wont even exist in your world, or even at the back of your mind.

think of me when you are back in your bed, thick spectacles clad in garfield gown and after flossing your teeth about 10 times.

think of me when you are lonely inspite of your warming flow of friends because you know, i love you still.