Better

You know something? I feel lighter today (not in terms of weight) and actually.. happier! I spent alot of travelling time thinking about ..things in general and I think I should still remain that Jerk that I was before. It makes me happier and I could take things easily rather than this forever lover persona. It really wore me down being one because every single thing I do I get so affected but hey I am the treasurer of memories and I am the super wonder of What-ifs.

I think she is really good at resisting and refraining and it is fabulous for her because I dont want to hurt her the way I have done it and I wouldnt want anyone to hurt her the way I did. She remains as a good friend and a special friend that I know part of me would always love her since from the start of the friendship. She is really amazing and I know that whoever gets her would be really lucky! I guess we would see what we want when we are older and maybe when we are older, maybe things could be given a shot again in uh, a pure and unadultered love and loving in such carefree that we just fall in love with each other with the world turning away and that she knowing my sincerity. I guess you'd have guessed my positivity is overflowing currently at this moment.. But although we talked lesser right now, I hope she do know that I still care alot and I am around, invisible and that if she needs anyone for b&j and whitechicks or even mambo, I'd be here.

For me, I guess that jerk in me will never leave until someone good comes along again. I guess I am a better friend than lover. Which I have always insisted that I dont do friends.. But I dont mind doing it all over again hahah, hey it has its perks! Now I know why Cheryl always date friends..

Cheryl & I were on the phone talking about warping on warpness and we both agreed it was time to date men and get out of this messy lesbian world that quite depresses us all the time and our hearts could never take it. But I guess we are still pretty lesbians since we are all going for Butch Hunt tonight!

Maybe I need a butch in my life. Like a butch loving me and taking care of me. OMG I CANT BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT!!!!

But what's wrong with that? My ex girlfriend used to be a butch and I like being dominated. I love girls I love girls I love girls and I cant deny.

P/s: Carrie has free incoming calls now since the M1 advertisement.
Pp/s: My Sims have given birth to twins and I am so busy right now!

For now,
Jerk signing out.